Friday, November 20, 2009
byebye ah ma
i thought i had a few days more when i typed the last post.
but it happened hours after that.
the nurse called us in the wee hours of sunday morning and asked us to rush down to the hospice to spend our final hours with her. she passed away peacefully in the early afternoon with many love ones by the side.
i have decided not to blog the details. because it is now not the sad moments that i want to remember and share :)
thank you all for your kindest love and support during this season of my life. it is certainly a BIG BIG transition with the lost of grandma, and then starting work the following week.
i can do it! :)
Saturday, November 14, 2009
she was young and pretty,
she became a wife,
she became a mother,
she became a grandmother, my ah ma.
she used to wait for me at the park where i would cross the overhead bridge to get to her house after school. she cooks great egg fried rice, the teochew mee hoon kwey, and she never forgets my favourite si shuang cai teng. she'll fry fresh onions and i will sit by the kitchen table to have the first serving.
i'll sleep with her on her bed for my afternoon naps. she still keeps my little bolster i used since i was young. she sees me role play as a teacher when i was young, walkin around her house but she doesn't think i am crazy. when i feel constipated and had problem with my bowels, she said by the toilet door, and said, " ummmmmmmmmmm! " i'ld ask her for a dollar or two to buy my favourite snacks from the mama shop below her house and give her a red bean ice cream in return of her favor at times. and once in a while, she stretches out her hand and ask for a share of the snacks that i bought.
sometimes i get naughty. she threatens to 'boot!' me with the belt behind the door. but like what you think, she doesnt do that. never once.
she's now at the final walk of her life. i feel sad to need to say the final words....
will there be a miracle?
Wednesday, November 11, 2009
:)
really want to thank God for my sweetest boyfriend and playmate for being always there to support me while i go through this (to me) very big transition of my life. he was there throughout when i was studying for my exam while i would many times impatiently talk to him due to all the stress that i was going through. other than many good friends around.. he was there to also assure and celebrate my good results and then pray with me that i will find a career that God will want me to be in. he prepares me for interview by asking me grilling questions which left me totally demoralised :S
he's such an awesome man :D
i love u! esp when you play with josiah!
chow-pok celebrates 5 years of friendship through mugging, shopping, crying, laughing, manicuring, pedicuring, happy birthdaying... from jc.. to uni.. and now.. working.. :)thanks for saying hi to me on the first day of school that day!
if not.. u wldnt have meet such a great friend.
HAHAHHA!
date on sunday! :)
Tuesday, November 10, 2009
my heart has never felt so heavy for a while...
started when i was preparing sermon last weekend for the cell group meeting we had on saturday. i preached my best, gave the members the meat and prayed that more than just the 10 commandments, they would understand the HEART of GOD.
the HEART, indeed.
during our times of distress, desperations or simply when we are in need, we cry out to God for the desires of our heart to come to pass - it comes in a form of the desire career, our prospective wife/husband to be, our family, good friends we can share our time and heart with, more financial openings or doors to be open, to get into the course in poly or uni that we want although sometimes we're unsure how our current situation will lead to all these desired destinations...
He heard our cries, He understands our heart.. He kept to His word that when we seek first the kingdom of God, all that things that we NEED shall be ADDED unto us..
We receive the breakthoughts and our needs are fulfilled. We have the career that we desired for now. We got into the course of study, we are happily attached to the love of our life... we have more open doors for networking... and some of us started saying ....
" i am too busy... i am too tired.. i really need the weekend to rest... i really need the time for my partner.. i really need the time to study........ i really dont have time for God anymore."
how would the one who's blessed with you all these...... when we cried out for him.... feel when these blessings actually became a pitfall or a stumbling block in your relationship with him. and ultimately, losing your eternal promise. for some who are still awaiting for their breakthroughs, well why not look at this very life that you have. this moment that you are breathing is because God is merciful to you.
the fact is true. what gave has given, He can take it back. But He is always giving the 2nd chance, the 3rd, the 4th , the 5th.. and the almost never ending number of chances just to win you back to Him... As a human being, i would have told myself that i will not be nice to the person who have broke my heart so many times before. if i were God, i may be just so angry i would take away the breath of the person at that instant he disobeys.
BUT GOD is not like any one of us. He's mercy surpasses.. His grace surpasses...
Let's do our very best and remind ourselves not ot ever take God forgranted. always unceasingly be thankful TO GOD for this life that you have, the positions that you are in. :)
God's a good God, and He has great plans for you and I.
more so, He loves You!
Wednesday, October 28, 2009
josiah and his family officially shifted in with us yesterday for the next 2 months before their new house is ready...
it was a tedious one. the lift at my house is still not ready and hence they have to climb up and down the staircase to bring the stuff up and down. thank goodness it's not a lot.
didnt attend the leader's meeting last night as i was helping out to look after the kiddos... josiah has grown up and needs SO MUCH attention now... i guess thats what we can really give to them when they are young and is readily happy to receive it. when a child grows up, and you want to spend more time with him/her, he/she may not want the attention and time with you anymore. so parents, cherish the time you have with your kiddos esp while they are young! :D before you know it, you'll prob tell your kids (your wings... ready to fly hor ! hor! ) hahaha.. sounds familiar. i mean.. most of us gone through that.. been that done that.. bought a tshirt that says.. " im 21!" hahaha.
so happy for chow that she's found a good job and the working location is so near her place too. she've taught me that the sowing and reaping principle ALWAYS stand. thus i have sent a couple of resumes over last weekend too. hahahha.. and thereby receiving calls from various agents etc the following working day.
one of the call really make me :):):)
and guess what.. it's the healthcare industry that i ultimately wld want to see myself landing in!
praying that it'll go well.. if not.. I'LL GET THERE SOMEDAY SOMEHOW! :D
cheerios.. going to play with the kiddos again.. :)
Thursday, October 22, 2009
finally more and more good news about the growing economy. or rather.. the recovering economy....
while some speculates that job opportunities will be lesser for the last quarter till new year next year due to the year end bonuses etc... surveys from Hudsons says that there will be a sharp rise in hiring for the next 3 months till Dec - quoted from Channelnewsasia.
such a dilemma.
while people who are out of job struggle to get into a job opening.
people who have job openings struggle to get into the RIGHT job
and some others who HAVE a job, seek for more $$ and promotions. how can we even be contented and satisfied with what we have and where we are?
So should i or should i not take on this 6 months contract which is not paying v-well but reasonably paid and possibly a good career prospect with a very reputable company or should i continue with job search since companies are expected to hire even more for the next 3 months. (then again, they are expected doesnt mean they will do sooooo?)
OPPORTUNITY COST.
if only i didnt study that. i wldnt be so calculative now. HAHA.
but if i hadn't .. i'll foolishly jump in ANYTHING that comes.
oh God!
once again, let me confess this....
i may not like this transition. but i will get even stronger after this transition.. and with greater responsibilities, i will become a even more mature person!
oh YESSSSSSSS! Serene... YOU CAN DO IT!
Monday, October 19, 2009
saturday -
had cgm at my house for the final time before we change our location to riverwalk cos my bro will be shifting to my house for a interval stay before he shifts to his new house. my house will be so happening with josiah and joey around.. :D
im loving cell grp meetings more and more especially these few weeks... i love the way the members go more i depth in their testimony sharing and hence bringing glory to God directly through their sharings themselves. those were the days the cg leaders will summarise the testimony and bring in Jesus into the picture. but now it's different... :D everyone makes the step of glorifying Jesus themselves! :D as such.. even the cg atmosphere is different.. :) so proud of them.. indeed.. let us not just grow old in our age, but grow UP in our behaviour.
Thank God for e448. i love u guys! :D
